Committing to Nothing

An Hour of Silence Amidst the Noise

How many times in our busy lives do we pause everything we do for an entire hour? No music, no phones, no eavesdropping on other people’s conversations. No outside influences from the world. If you’re like most of us, the answer is likely very infrequently, if almost never.

When I first began weekly Eucharistic Adoration a few years ago, my body and mind were shocked by the empty expanse caused by an hour of fixed, solitary silence. Staying in one place for an entire hour, removed from my pressing to do list and persistent noise distractions, was a foreign experience to me.

I experienced a similar shock when I first started reading for pleasure again a few months after graduating college. With reading, I found that I had to set a timer for myself and then exercise trust that the timer was working without my intervention. Only then could I stay focused on my reading without checking the timer, getting up to make coffee, check my email, straighten something, or simply give up on my reading efforts. My attention span was completely fried due to a life of quick reads online, catchy upbeat songs, contending tasks seeking my attention, and general laziness. Something utilitarian always seemed to demand more attention than the delight of reading for pleasure, all by myself. When I needed to unwind, the low effort buzz obtained by streaming a show always promised hours of entertainment without any tax to my energy (needless to say, that promise was a lie - there is nothing quite as energy sapping as binging TV shows for hours).

I found that setting a timer helped me to commit to reading for a decent chunk of time, and I slowly increased the time until I found my ability to stay hooked on a book had returned. It was an exercise that was pathetic in its necessity, but it proved effective. Since then, I’ve increased my reading time each year, slowly returning to the time and attention I once had in my youth, before the noises of the modern world encroached on my peace.

An hour in prayer during Adoration proved to be a similar struggle to master. When I first started, and even now if I have to skip a week or two when traveling, I find that the first few weeks are “wasted” as I spend the entire hour bouncing from thought to thought, none of which are directly related to God. Confronted with an hour of silence, my mind begins to slowly unwind all of the thoughts that have built up and have never had a chance to be processed due to the constant noise that fills my world.

Even when I stick to my weekly commitment, if I am having particularly busy week, I find that the first chunk of my holy hour is spent trying to shift my mind away from the barrage of worries and to dos that have built up. As I’ve noticed this pattern emerge, I’ve become more and more convinced of the need we have to set aside time in our lives to do nothing.

We must prioritize the unwinding of our minds. Like a dance or a song, we must listen to the rhythm of our days and allow for pauses between steps, spaces between words. As hard as it is, we must set aside time for intellectual growth through reading, spiritual growth through prayer, and mental growth through processing our thoughts and emotions in silence. Just as we exercise our body at the gym, we must also exercise our mind.

Sometimes I am afforded the time to while away the hour at Skyline Drive, or to take a long walk or hike and process my thoughts. Other times, life is too busy and all I can manage is turning off the radio in the car and driving in silence. Like reading, prayer, lifting weights, refining our cooking skills, or any other accomplishment, the art of pondering and processing our thoughts is something that must be worked at. It isn’t mastered overnight, and it most certainly demands fine tuning at every turn. But like anything, little by little we can deepen the grooves of habit by intentional choices, discipline, and perseverance.

Here’s to setting aside time for nothing.